SCHOOL IS STARTING SOON.

this song just touches me everytime i listen to it =)

Complete by Parachute Band

Here I am, Oh God
I bring this sacrifice, my open heart
I offer up my life
I look to You, Lord
Your love that never ends
Restores me again

So I lift my eyes to you, Lord
In Your strength will I break through, Lord
Touch me now, let your love fall down on me
And I will be complete in You.

Here I am, Oh God
I bring this sacrifice--my open heart.
I offer up my life.
I look to You, Lord.
Your love that never ends
Restores me again

So I lift my eyes to you Lord
And by faith, I will walk on, Lord
Then I'll see beyond my calvary one day,
And I will be complete in..

I look to You, Lord
Your love that never ends
Restores me again

So I lift my eyes to you Lord
In your strength will I break through Lord
Touch me now, let your love fall down on me
I know your love dispels all my fears.

Through the storm I will hold on Lord
And I pray I will hold on, Lord
Then I'll see beyond my calvary one day
And I will be complete in
I will be complete in
I will be complete in You


all is good, save for the fact that i simply cant leave my house due to fever.
Everyone is getting sick, and its stifling to be sick.

I missed:

1. BM
2. Leaders Meeting
3. CG

goodness. and the list just extends till i get well!
OMG. FOP IS ON FRIDAY! i just HAVE TO, MUST GET WELL.

till then.

life's unpredictable, it has always been this way..

i dedicate this post to my beloved ah gong...

to the person who has taken care of me for the longest time,

one who always gets up at 5 am just to get all of us young ones breakfast

one who would sit beside me to read the chinese newspaper

one who would always ask whether i have eaten

one who loves to sit in that same chair, in the same position eating porridge

one who loves watching chinese opera

one who i always see in the white cotten tee with shorts and a belt

one who is ever-patient and ever-loving

words cannot express the many years of love and care he has shown to this family and even to his friends..

i love you... rest in peace..

hello world.

It has been the longest time since I actually blogged, partially due to exam-phobia, laziness and just plain procrastination.

Life has been pretty exciting since the day I left the exam hall of NUS. Penning down my last full-stop on my script.

My hard work, all the encouragement from my leaders, my friends, my family-- thank you so much. This time round as i opened my mail to check my CAP, the feeling was different, I felt assured, that whatever the outcome, I knew that my heart would be glad. And surely yes, I did scored so much better this time round, salvaging my horrendous score last sem. It has been pretty much as emotional roller-coaster the days following Friday, happiness, disappointment, fear, nervousness. ahhahaha all mixed into one whole week.

Happiness spells for my results.
disappointment spells for my very lousy major module grade
fear spells for the near-loss of my wallet
nervousness spells for worrying whether I can cope with whatever that is given to me
And lastly, a tinge of sadness for feeling that I'm not a good friend.

I have been having the feeling that I am not doing enough, in my life, in my friends' life. And it gets me down when I just read through those posts.

Why? I have no answer.

But, don't get me wrong, this is definitely not an emo post, and i'm definitely NOT EMO :) life is filled with too much expectations,for ourselves, for our families, for our friends, and the list is never-ending. Its when these expectations are not met when we feel that our world is o longer how it used to be, we start to feel that the people around us are changing, no longer the same, no longer how we used to know them as. But these expectations are also what keeps us strong, strength to believe that change is just part and parcel of life.

this is really complicated.

on a lighter note,

praying that all my dear friends out there who are in the process of appealing, believe that things will work out, there's always a way out of everything!

hoping that chin chin and ben will enjoy their jobs

that people who have lost heart will find their way back :)

I believe that some things will never change, not tomorrow, not next week, next year or even in this lifetime.

have not been blogging for the longest time. here i am at an unearthly hour of 3.12 am feeling pretty lost.

school's been hectic, busy, nerve-wrecking and sleep losing.
i take back my words when i said this sem was going to be better than last sem. But above the chionging from mon-fri, with me totally sapped on wednesday and rejuvenated on weekends again, it really does take a huge part out of me.

drained. but not totally.

i still put on a smile from the inside, cos' I know my God will never give me things that are impossible to deal with! so I pray that in the next one month, I will hang on, hang on, hang on and wait patiently for my 3 mths HOLIDAY, so I can just serve more in church, be around my family more, spend some quality time with quality people and YES. I WILL WAIT.

the guys in D8 will soon be enlisting, probably ard 2 weeks time, really gonna miss having them around. hahaha. They have really been such a blessing and joy in D8, being so nonsensical at times, hugging each other, dancing with each other, doing the craziest stuff ever imagined, but behind all that lies a heart that cares, that loves. GONNA MISS THEM =)

to all my friends out there who are chionging your projects, reports, essays...
LETS DO THIS TGH! =)

for me, D8 CHALET is the NEXT BIG THING YO! hahahahahahaha.
this will really be a time of fellowship, living life under one roof for a day, doing mad stuff tgh, and just spending time time time!



Thank you God for everything...

on the verge of going mad.

just leave me alone

school has finally, seriously started. as usual bidding, balloting takes alot out of us. hahaha. but luckily by the grace of God, it went so much better for this semester. Now i just have to really pray that i can secure my very last tutorial.

Im really getting very blur these days, maybe there are just so many things weighing down in my heart, and there's no way to lessen the load or stop thinking about it. Its just complicated.

hope my ah ma gets better real fast, walk like normal, smile like normal. shoo shoo to all the pain and aches which refuse to go away. =)

D8 has really been a great joy, great laughter and i love them to bits! the guys are slowly enlisting, with gerald first on the list..aww... gonna really miss him mans. After which u can virtually see all the sr ppl ka boom, and into the bushes of pulau ubin. LOL. It felt pretty much the same with my jc classmates going into the army, but somehow, its a kind of different feel altogether. hahahahaha.

been planning and working round my time table pretty well, taking fewer wrong train rides, being more on time and doing my best to sleep earlier and of cos drink less coffee!

CGs are much more fun! with all the camwhoring (kudos to my cam, nxt best friend's cam and also my dear yuting's cam!) Its really hilarious i tell u whenever i browse through the most random, most candid shot ever.

all the fun and laughter inside, I just feel somehow the way i used to see some things is really starting to change, almost like unbelievably. the kind of attachment, feelings and bond seemed to have vanished. The many promises we used to make, the many 'things' that we always agree upon. Its no longer the same, i guess its just really goes to show how much something is worth. Choosing to close that part in my heart is probably the best answer to all the questions that are really bothering me. ah. its gonna be fine =)

Starting on my BRP has really raised the level of spirituality in me. almost like immediately.there's just a peace that fills me, fills my heart whenever i complete my quiet time. its not an obligation,not a habitual thing, but its becoming something that i long to do, something that keeps me going on. no matter how tough it gets. Its really the spirit of God that fills you to the brim and that strengthens our walk with Him. =)

okays. i have rambled quite alot. shall let some pictures do the talking.

Today was FUN FUN FUN.

Yeahs we had a CG baking session @Shu Yi's house. I tell you we were quite close to bombing her kitchen with the uncontrollable electronic mixer and lots of batter flying everywhr. LOL. tiring but nevertheless hilarious!

Cheeri, calvin, wan chin, ding jie and me worked on the cookies. Proud to say with the agaration of or chief Chef, Calvin Leong, Cheeri and my endless laughters, Wan Chin endless giggles and trying to siam the whisk in my hand, and ding jie who shakes his head in utter amazement, the cookies turned out GREAAAAAAT!

Kudos to the ppl watching pirates in the living room, testing our batches of cookies! HAHAHAHAHAS. they made us feel better when they ate up all the cookies mans!
What was the supporting role in the whole day?

It had to be TORTALLY JELLY MIX
Hohohoho. The jelly thankfully got rid of all the chocs floating in our stomachs i tell u! It was a relief to eat something else other than chocolates! =)

did pretty designs for dearest fifi and dom and also Pastors! hahaha. although its a lil teeny weeny bit out of shape, its still NICEEEEE =)

Yahs, bidding officiallY starts today, but for me, it will start on 2 Jan. What a way to start the new yr. Safe to say i have 1 module already, and the er efficient dpt has even put up the READINGS. i am in utter awe.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAK!!!
I nv reeli took the time to thank my caretaker of many many years, 16 to be exact. I thank her for the love, care and everything she has given these past 16 years. Her cooking is reeli awesome lahs, it has won the hearts of my friends. ahhaa. She already is a grandma. can u believe it.
I prob talk to her the most, tell her good things, rubbish things, good results, bad results. hahaha. EVERYTHING. =) I loveeeeee her!

So as the year comes to a close, I really look back on this yr, a very eventful year indeed. The year which saw many hellos and many goobyes, many great friends met, many joys and nevertheless sadness. But I have really grown so so much this year. So much that I cant really believe it.
But I believe the year ahead is gonna be a BLASTTTT. And I know all that's in my heart will come to pass too.
D8 has really been GROWING. and the people in it are really awesome. The year ahead is gonna be eggciting with most of them going into army, serving the nation, I know they will stay strong, even stronger than before. D8 IS LOVVVVEEEE =D


We can start to dream and know all our dreams will start to come to pass when we put our Faith in Him. =)